The Dirty Window

Oftentimes I sit at the large kitchen island, directly across from a dirty window.

I sit there with great intention — determined to put my thoughts on paper. But more often than not, I find myself just staring… gazing for what feels like an eternity through that dirty window.

And as I sit here again, staring through the smudged glass, I begin to wonder why I have never mustered up enough motivation to clean it.

In an awkward, almost confusing way, I have come to realize something:

I find comfort in the dirty window.

As strange as that sounds, I’ve caught myself rationalizing it more than once. The dirty window has become a quiet form of consistency. And if I am honest, consistency is something my heart longs for more often than I would like to admit.

The window is imperfect — yet unchanging.
The beautiful view beyond it is clouded by spatter and streaks.
The mess blurs what could otherwise be clear.

And yet… it remains the same.

Then it hits me.

Life is the dirty window.

Each day brings its own spatter. Its own streaks. Its own unexpected splashes of chaos that we often have no idea how to cleanse. The more we try to wipe it away, sometimes the more smeared and cloudy it becomes.

We try to fix the mess.
We try to restore clarity.
We try to regain control.

But life lacks the consistency we crave.

Every new day holds unknown variables.
Unexpected conversations.
Unplanned disappointments.
Unforeseen struggles.

And that lack of consistency can create an environment that feels unsteady. Unstable. Unpredictable.

Yet at the end of the day, when I sit back down at the island and gaze through that same dirty window, there is something oddly comforting about its unchanged imperfection.

The mess is still there.
The smudges haven’t moved.
The view is still blurred.

And somehow, that consistency in the imperfection steadies me.

But here is what the Lord has been gently whispering to my heart:

While the window may remain dirty… He does not.

Our days may feel inconsistent.
Our emotions may fluctuate.
Our circumstances may cloud our vision.

But God is not unstable.

“The Lord is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust.” — Psalm 91:2

Refuge.
Fortress.
Not shifting.
Not unpredictable.
Not clouded.

When life spatters our windows and blurs our view, it is easy to grow accustomed to the mess. We learn to live with the streaks. We adapt to the distortion. Sometimes we even mistake the familiar chaos for comfort.

But our true consistency is not found in the unchanging mess.

It is found in an unchanging God.

Hebrews 13:8 reminds us:

“Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.”

Yesterday — when the window first got dirty.
Today — as we stare through it.
Forever — long after the smudges are gone.

Life may feel inconsistent.
Our emotions may feel unstable.
Our clarity may feel clouded.

But God remains steady in the middle of our scattered days.

And maybe — just maybe — the dirty window isn’t there to comfort me.

Maybe it is there to remind me that even when my view is blurred, my foundation is not.

Even in the mess.
Even in the unknown.
Even in the inconsistent chaos of each day.

He is steady.

And that is enough.